Surgery Day

IT´S BEEN days since my last post mainly because I did not want to bring the mac to the hospital. My blogging nerves were already shot with worry. But here it is, as much as I can remember. The last days went by like a blur.

September 8

Adam and I spent a cosy evening: cooked a nice meal, put on music (a flea market find from the day before, a CD of torch songs) and quietly talked about our plans. It was a feeble attempt at diverting our tension to more productive pursuits.

Eventually, Adam gave up and went in to rest, praying for sleep to claim his worries... at least for a few hours. Not me though. I could not sleep. Instead, I watched TV and read a book. Not one show or line I can even remember now. I was happy that the pre-op guidelines did not forbid me from eating anything after midnight, so at 3 am I rustled up a shrimp omelette and had it with rice. Went to bed afterwards.

Got woken up at 6:30 am and as Adam reviewed both pre and post-op guidelines, i gathered my thoughts and whispered a prayer. I must admit though that I even briefly entertained the idea of just skipping the surgery and taking my chances. Getting into the car was tough.

Walking into the waiting area, I saw 4 other patients. All of them elderly and apparently used to the pre-operative process. I saw a 70 year old man taking the arm of his sick wife. Really heartwarming. What really lifted

my flagging spirits was that a rainbow appeared. A rainbow is always a good sign.

My surgery was to happen right after lunch, so to relax while waiting we decided that it would be a good idea for me to proceed to the clean room and just read. It was tough seeing Adam go (since he cannot be in the clean room). Tried reading a book, which did not work since my mind was running 100 miles a minute. I was promptly given a sedative by the nurse. Three hours later, a team cam in to wheel me into the operating room. I found out that anesthesia is a sleep light switch, the next thing I knew I was being wheeled into the recovery room (RR). There, I was in a state of half-awareness. I was conscious but pain and medication blurred the concept of reality. I do remember being asked about where I work and if I have family here in Iceland. Also, that I tried to take off my oxygen cannula because oxygen made my nose and throat dry. When they kept putting it back on, I asked what my oxygen saturation was before I stopped taking it off. It was also strange to hear the recovery room nurse en

dorsing me to the post-surgery ward nurse and knowing that this is something that I would´ve normally done myself as a nurse. It was a surrealistic experience being on the other side of the fence. I was learning.